7 Ways to Totally Blow it With Your New Crush
You went on an awesome date with a new hottie last weekend and every thing seemed to go perfectly — he’s funny, you had a great conversation, you didn’t trip or do anything embarrassing. So, why hasn’t he called you since? The simple solution may be that you have committed one of the seven secret errors that guys judge women for. Girl, you better put that Diet Coke and lip gloss down and keep reading to make sure you never scare away a perfect catch again!
Don’t Be Un-like-able
You wouldn’t, like, turn in a report to your boss, that said “like” after like every sentence cause that like wouldn’t make you sound smart, like, you know? So, like, why would you say “like” over 15 times in like two sentences if you wanted to come off as like intelligent to a guy? It’s just, like, common sense.
If the guy you’re on a date with asks you what your favorite movie is and you respond with, “it’s a tie between ’Legally Blonde’ and ’Mean Girls’” you’ve probably just inspired an eye-roll. Though I agree that both films are cinematic masterpieces, I am weary of how soon I reveal my obsessive love for these movies to the guys I date. As witty and quotable as chick flicks are, guys who don’t understand and relate to them quite often misjudge you for liking them.
A few days ago, guy friend nonchalantly asked me for a pen from my purse and I thought nothing of it. When I excavated one 12 seconds later, he told me it was a test…and I failed. If it takes more than 5 seconds for you to find an item in your bag, you’re definitely being judged. A cluttered purse means a cluttered personal life. Remove those expired car wash coupons, tangled necklaces, and unpaid parking tickets from your purse; then, watch the boys line up around the corner.
Many guys actually think bikini tan lies are hot. NO guys think that self-tanner lines are hot. Those orange, streaky lines that run down your legs and arm are a solid turn-off, and will come with a guarantee that guys will judge you as fake or materialistic. You obviously don’t want to look like Casper and a subtle glow does wonders for the complexion, however when you “fake and bake” or use so much self tanner that you look like an entirely different ethnicity, you have entered problematic territory.
Guys aren’t going to judge you for subtle, natural makeup. Guys are going to judge you for raccoon eyes, cake face, and clown cheeks. “Spidery,” crusty, black eyelashes and intense, dark shadow gives off a porn star vibe (God forbid you sport this look in the daytime). Also, if you have an inch of foundation on, it’s just going to rub off on his nice shirt when you hug him and piss him off. Finally, under no circumstances should you bring back his repressed childhood fear of Chucky by making your cheeks pinker than a circus clown.
Facebook Profile Pictures
When scoping your Facebook, guys want to see you in various atmospheres — with your family, out with friends, dressed up, dressed down, having fun, acting silly et cetera. If every one of your pics is taken at a party, in a mirror, or in the duck lips pose, that’s something guys definitely notice. Your profile pictures undoubtedly say a lot about you, so make sure they don’t say “conceited” or “alcoholic.”
You probably don’t even notice that you’re doing it, but he sure does. Fixing your bangs, biting your lip, twirling your earrings, re-applying lip gloss — they’ve become habitual tasks that mean nothing to you. However, they send a message that you’re nervous and self-conscious. Take a deep breath and quit tapping your foot; you’ll seem a lot more relaxed and easy-going to your date.
Are you realizing you’re guilty of some of the above? No worries! It’s never too late to swap your thick concealer for a tinted moisturizer. A quick trip to CVS or taking two minutes to clean your purse could mean a call back from that cute musician you’ve been swooning over.